Miss Doodle Mae: "In a time of 'fake news' and 'alternative facts,' Jojo's Discount Dollar Store has become a safe haven for the common people. Jojo, our fearless leader, always reminds the staff of their responsibility to uplift, encourage and serve the customer, because the open doors at Jojo's Discount Dollar Store represent what makes America good. For example, the concept of allowing Chief Crazy Brother, our store display and head cashier, to use store aisle 7-and-1/5 for political, social and entertainment events. Aisle 7-and-1/5 proves to be an asset to the store and the community.
"Also, I've seen people enter Jojo's Discount Dollar Store troubled and leave relieved because Jojo treats all people with the utmost dignity and respect. A highly educated staff person says Jojo is the 'Sir Thomas Moore' of the neighborhood because Jojo strives to create an almost utopian work and store environment.
"The good news is that Jojo's Discount Dollar Store will continue to be affordable, accessible, accommodating and available to anyone who comes through the doors. The popular aisle 7-and-1/5 will become an improved in-store version of the community gathering place.
"Look for the anticipated isle 7-and-1/5 event: 'In Search of Affordable Health Care Town Hall Meeting and Sale,' also known as 'What to Do When the Politicians Eliminate Health Care Insurance for the Poor.' Congressman Smokey 'Robinson' McBride and Nurse Tootie McBride will moderate the meeting. All Trump supporters are cordially invited to attend."