Smokey "Robinson" McBride: "I am very pleased to see so many involved, aware and concerned citizens of the 'Ghetto Science Community' participating in the Ghetto Science Team Political Action Committee Voter Registration Drive. I am very glad that you are determined to motivate disenfranchised citizens to run like Forrest Gump to the polls and vote.
"Because of negative sentiments and inflammatory statements toward the middle class, poor, elderly, unemployed, etc., the Ghetto Science Team Political Action Committee will apply some of the political organizing methods used during the Civil Rights era.
"Some of you will be assigned to counteract 'voter vigilante' groups attempting to intimidate minorities who have every right to vote. Additional security assistance and transportation to the polls will be provided by the Church Deacon Mechanics for Defense,' courtesy of Rev. Cletus Car Sales Church.
"Nurse Tootie McBride and her 'CNAs (Certified Nurse Assistants) for a Brighter Day' will also be present at the polls to help transport disabled voters and administer emergency medical treatment.
"Rudy McBride of the Let Me Hold Five Dollars National Bank will fund get-out-the-vote drives, phone banks and door-to-door canvassing to identify favorable voters.
"Vendors such as Bubba Robinski, Earnest 'Monday Night Football Head' Walker, Mr. Habib, Brother Hustle and the Cream-O-Wheat Man will provide snacks, hot food and drinks.
"Also, our technology specialist, Aunt Tee Tee Hustle, will help prevent subtle acts of voter suppression with her newly patented 'Anti-Voter Suppression Surveillance and Detection System.'
"It's vote time! Remember to register by Oct. 5."