Entry
Missouri, Stop Putting Secession Ideas in Mississippi's Head
By R.L. NaveApparently, in my native Missouri (also known as the most methy state in the nation), a billboard has popped up along an Interstate asking passersby to "Consider a contiguous 5-state secession" with Texas, Louisiana, Oklahoma, Missouri and Mississippi.
That's interesting.
For one, that would be a pretty weird-ass-shaped nation (see image below). And, two, I checked all the Mississippi secessionist blogs that I read on a regular basis and found no discussion of a secession plan including those five states.
The Missouri billboard also asks about the pros and cons of forming such a union.
Well, here's a quick list, off the top of our heads:
Pro: Finally, Mississippi gets to disassociate from the awfulness of Alabama and Arkansas. Con: Mississippi would no longer have Alabama and Arkansas to deflect some of the negative attention away from us.
Pro: Mississippi would no longer be considered part of the South. Con: Mississippi would no longer be part of the South.
Pro: Mississippi would have the nicest beaches in the country and be the nation's literary and cultural capital. Con: We still wouldn't have a Six Flags or a Dave & Buster's.
Pro: Being lumped in with Texas and Oklahoma, Mississippi's politics would come off as moderate. Con: The Mississippi Legislature would lose its distinction as the nation's nuttiest legislative body.
What are some more pros and cons?
http://jacksonfreepress.com/users/photos/2013/oct/11/14109/
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By R.L. NaveDear Magnolia State Meth Dealers:
Do not interpret this as a challenge.
But Mississippi is one of the least methy states in the nation, a new Huffington Post infographic shows.
Citing something called the Nationa(l) Security System, or NSS, HuffPost said that Mississippi had five meth-lab-related accidents in 2012.
Given Mississippi's ruralness and high rate of poverty -- both of which are key for optimal methy conditions -- you'd think the incidents would be much higher.
So what's our secret?
The report notes: "Oregon and Mississippi have figured out how to curb these accidents by making the key meth ingredient pseudoephedrine prescription-only."
The nation's most methy state was Missouri, with 1,825 meth incidents.
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